Not perfect.

A blog about overcoming perfectionism and other stuff

Let's start

2019-02-12 17:30

So I've decided to start a blog. It wil be about overcoming perfectionism which I've had for quite a long time — I think from about when I first started going to school.

While it's kinda nice in a way — always trying to create work that you are proud of, sometimes (too often, almost always) it gets in the way.

You want to write a new program to learn that new language you've been hearing a lot about recently, but oh no, you don't want to write something someone has already made, why waste bytes and your time? As a result you don't get to make anything. And don't learn that new language.

You want to make your SO feel nice and prepare some kind of a surprise or a present for her, but then every "romantic" idea under the moon seems to trite for you, so you scratch your head, think real hard, don't come up with anything, disappoint yourself, don't get anything for your SO and disappoint her as well.

It's like there is some kind of a filter in the brain that throws out every simple idea from your head, making you feel blank whenever you need to come up with anything, making you feel stupid and ultimately ruining your life for no good reason. It's a powerful force and it's great at making you sad.

I've lost count of how many personal projects I've thrown away because of that fear of it not being perfect or remotely good. From "objective" experience I can also tell that a lot of people got successful by making things that weren't perfect in any way or form and just putting it out there into the world. Yesterday I've read a really insightful article from Tim O'Reilly about ways of starting and growing your company, and it has kinda acted like a trigger for me: why am I always waiting for an opportunity to come instead of just fucking doing the thing and going from there?


So today I've made this blog. If you can call it that. As of right now, it's just a collection of simple static html's, with no Javascript, minimal CSS, held together by a duct-tape. And there was almost no editing done.

I have intentionally made it this way. Maybe sometimes I will write a simple python script that will generate this stuff from some text files or whatever, and generate RSS feed for me, or maybe I'll just do it by hand (I think I'll automate it eventually though). Ghost? Nah, never heard of that.

This is by design. Make it as simple as possible, make it as "un-perfect" as possible, focus on getting things out there as quickly as possible. Figure stuff out later, when the real need to do so comes.

I should probably also create a git repo for this stuff, so I could make changes in an all-around better way. Probably tomorrow. Whatever.

I should warn everyone coming in here that this thing has a great chance of pivoting into some kind of technical blog and not be about perfectionism at all. I've kinda diverged from that theme already, ha. But really, I need to find some research, try to follow it, post the results here, see if it works or not, make this a living "documentary" of my attempts at bettering my life by removing that thing. We'll see how it goes.

Oh, by the way, do I also need a favicon? :)

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